Love Addiction / Relationship Addiction

1) What it is

A pattern of compulsively seeking relationships/attention for emotional regulation, often tolerating unhealthy situations to avoid feeling alone.

2) Feels like

“I can’t be alone.”

“I stay even when it hurts.”

“I lose myself in relationships.”

3) Signs

• repeated intense relationships
• fear of abandonment
• people pleasing
• ignoring red flags
• obsession and emotional dependence

4) Causes

• attachment insecurity
• trauma
• low self-worth
• loneliness
• unmet needs

5) Triggers

• breakup, conflict
• rejection
• boredom/loneliness
• alcohol/drugs

6) Helps now

• pause contacting them for 1 hour
• call a friend
• grounding + cold water reset
• write down “what I need vs what I chase”

7) Longer-term

• therapy for boundaries
• rebuild identity and routine
• learn secure attachment behaviours
• practise being alone safely

8) Treatment

• counselling/CBT
• group support
• trauma therapy if relevant

9) Medication

If anxiety/depression is present.

10) Tips

• don’t confuse intensity with love
• practise stable, consistent connection
• protect your standards

11) Urgent

Urgent if:

• self-harm risk
• domestic abuse is present

12) UK help

• NHS urgent help
• Refuge (domestic abuse support)
• Samaritans / Shout

‍