Personality Disorders

1) What it is

Personality disorders involve long-term patterns of thoughts, emotions, and behaviours that affect self-image, relationships, and daily functioning. These patterns usually develop over time and can cause distress, but many people improve significantly with structured therapy and support.

2) What it feels like

• “My emotions feel overwhelming.”
• “Relationships are intense or unstable.”
• “I’m scared people will leave me.”
• “I don’t really know who I am.”

3) Common signs & symptoms

• intense emotions that feel hard to manage
• relationship difficulties or fear of abandonment
• impulsivity or risky behaviours
• difficulty trusting people
• strong mood swings or feelings of emptiness

4) Why it happens (causes & risk factors)

• early life trauma or unstable environments
• genetics and temperament
• long-term stress and unmet emotional needs
• attachment difficulties

5) Triggers

• perceived rejection or abandonment
• conflict in relationships
• criticism or feeling misunderstood
• emotional closeness
• stress and lack of routine

6) What helps now

• emotional regulation techniques
• grounding and calming the nervous system
• clear boundaries and communication skills
• routine and sleep support
• identifying triggers and coping plans

7) Daily self-help support

• practise naming emotions rather than acting on them
• use coping skills before crises escalate
• track patterns between triggers and reactions
• build predictability into daily life

8) Professional treatment options

• Dialectical Behaviour Therapy (DBT) for emotion regulation and coping
• Mentalisation-Based Therapy (MBT) for understanding emotions and relationships
• Schema Therapy for long-standing patterns and healing

9) Medication

There is no medication that treats personality disorders directly, but medication may help co-existing conditions such as anxiety, depression, or mood instability, guided by a GP or psychiatrist.

10) Practical tips

• personality disorders are not character flaws
• change is possible with time and support
• consistency matters more than intensity
• setbacks are part of progress

11) When to seek urgent help

Urgent help if:

• emotions feel uncontrollable
• impulsive or risky behaviours escalate
• thoughts of self-harm or suicide appear
• relationships become unsafe

12) Where to get help (UK)

• GP referral to specialist mental health services
• NHS community mental health support
• crisis support via NHS urgent mental health services if needed

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